We are all adults here, right? Ok, ok, maybe not mature adults, but we at least usually pretend to be grown ups. And most of us can stand to take constructive criticism of our work or a task. If I make a mistake on a website or you an error in addition, we are not all caught up in it. I don’t believe any of us will freak out if it is pointed out that we pulled the push door. It happens, we laugh, we learn we move on.
So what about more personal problems. How do you tell someone, someone who is a friend, that they do something that is really wrong, offensive or hurtful? That shouldn’t be so hard, right? But it is. I have a friend who continually does rude things and makes rude comments. I find them impossible to take at times, but the friend thinks they are funny. So how do I explain this to the person without feeling really awkward and risking the friendship? This is not a shallow or ignorant individual, and by no means am I easily offended, but somethings just go to far. Personal slams, grossly crude behavior, and just genuinely insensitive or intolerant remarks are some of those things.
I guess I am being a wuss, but I find myself just avoiding the person in various ways. This is a shame because overall the person has a lot to offer and has been supportive of me. But since I can’t figure out a way to tell them about the way I feel, I just do the old avoidance game.
So, what would you do? How would you handle this? How can you just come out and tell someone that there behavior is offensive?